All Summer In A Day
by eggstraordinary
Summary: Tsuna and Hibari were still hovering in between the lines defining their relationship when Tsuna decided to be engaged to somebody else. Future!HibarixFuture!Tsuna. AU-ish.
1. Chapter 1

**Title: **All Summer In A Day

**Disclaimer:** Not mine. Amano-sensei owns Reborn!

**Summary: **Tsuna and Hibari were still hovering in-between the lines of their relationship when Tsuna decided to be engaged to somebody else. Future!HibarixFuture!Tsuna. AU-ish.

**Pairing: **1827 or HibarixTsuna.

**Note: **Tsuna is twenty-one, and Hibari is one year older. Took place before _A Temporary Surrender Of Temperance_. **Now **refers to events of the present. **Then** refers to a flashback.

* * *

><p>'<em>I'm getting engaged, Hibari-san.'<em>

_**Now.**_

The west wing soaked up the largest amount of the Italian sun, and was, therefore, Tsuna's favorite part of the house; and it was here that Tsuna spent much of his Italian summer days napping on the large, old leather couch in the office (before Reborn came along and smacked him awake to go train). And it was here today that Tsuna stood by the large open window, watching the incoming guests from below.

It was late spring now, the season fading slowly into summer. Spring still stubbornly draped across the gentle green slopes and lingered in the humid air, not willing to give in just yet. Tsuna thought of the mildly sunny and windy spring of Japan and felt a wave of longing washed over him.

He tugged at his tie lightly to loosen the tight feeling around his neck to no avail, hoping that Reborn, who was standing behind him, would miss the movement and not smack him on the head for messing up his tie.

The wind ruffled the thin white curtains, and they fluttered in the air, temporarily blocking Tsuna's view. Voices rose from below, but Tsuna couldn't distinguish them, nor did he catch the soft feminine voice that he had heard over the phone once and was expecting today. Tsuna reached out a hand to tug the curtains away, but stopped when he saw, through the thin white veil, a figure in bright yellow coming out of the black sedan.

His hand hovered uncertainly in the air before it fell beside him. Tsuna didn't want to see her right now. He knew what she looked like from the folder that Reborn handed him anyway. Tsuna would deal with this as it came, and even though that was only in a few minutes, he was willing to enjoy what little freedom he had left.

A soft shuffling sound to his left reminded Tsuna that he was not alone.

"Are you ready?" Reborn asked, a deep voice, grown out of its childish shell over the years.

"No," Tsuna answered honestly, feeling uncomfortable in his white suit, like his small, fifteen year-old self pretending to be a twenty-one year old man. "But I won't back down." The steadiness of his words reassured him that he had indeed lived all the years of his life. The fifteen year-old Tsuna might plan to flee, but the twenty-one year-old Tsuna understood well, from each scar on his skin, from each burn mark of battle on his friends' bodies, that there were things that he needed to protect, and there were things worth giving up. His family was in the former category; his need was the latter.

Tsuna turned from the window, intending to head downstairs and greet the guests. It was time.

A swift pair of hands caught him by the knot of his tie, and Tsuna peered up curiously at Reborn, who was a head taller than Tsuna even with Tsuna's growth spurt a while back. The corners of Reborn's lips twitched slightly in a smile that looked more like a smirk. "You've grown."

Tsuna laughed, scratching the back of his head as lightly as he could as not to disturb his neatly tied ponytail. "I have, haven't I?"

Years ago, he would have shrieked in surprise at Reborn's sudden movement, but now, he could sense Reborn's presence as easy as he could breathe.

His lungs felt tight with the thought of how much he had changed over the years.

"And you still have a long way to go," Reborn said, straightening Tsuna's tie with one quick twist of his hand. So Reborn had noticed that Tsuna was fussing with his tie. There was something in Reborn's eyes that made Tsuna felt uneasy, a melancholic pride that had Tsuna felt proud and sad for himself at the same time. "But you've done well for the past year, Vongola Decimo. Better than I thought you would."

"Thank you," Tsuna said, touched. "I wouldn't have been able to do it without your teaching." Rough and tough he may be, but Reborn was like a father to Tsuna, a mentor but a friend at the same time.

"Although I've yet to successfully teach you how to knot a tie," Reborn said with a tinge of amusement in his voice.

"My knot was fine," Tsuna protested, more for sake of old times than really disagreeing with Reborn.

"Gokudera helped you," Reborn pointed out, and something within Tsuna unwound. No matter how many years passed, no matter how many things changed, he would still have his family by his side. Tsuna didn't even know that he was desperately seeking for a confirmation of this until he found it: the tie knot that Gokudera enthusiastically helped him made, Yamamoto's useful input that made Gokudera irritated for the sake of being irritated at Yamamoto, Chrome's picking of the black and white pinstripes shirt, Bianchi's picking of the white tie, Ryohei's thumbs up of 'Extreme!' and Lambo's attempt to use it to strangle Reborn to get his attention.

Tsuna smiled at the memory.

Now the tie also had Reborn's blessing. Tsuna felt safer at the thought of his family being with him every step of the way.

It made it easier for Tsuna to accept the weight of his decision.

Tsuna blinked as Reborn placed both hands on his shoulders. "I've taught you all I can," Reborn said, and that tinge of melancholy returned, stronger than ever. "Whatever choices you make to benefit the family, I will support to the best of my capability." The hands on his shoulders tightened, and Tsuna immediately thought of the recent decision that he had made, the one that had thrown him in a hurricane of emotions that he didn't know how to sort, and wasn't going to, because he knew he would back down if he did.

Tsuna understood what Reborn meant. The training wheels were coming off. There were days when Reborn or another family member would openly oppose to Tsuna's plan because it was too risky or not effective enough, but those days were over. Now, everyone would put Tsuna's judgment above their own. Now, they placed their trust in his decisions.

"Thank you," was all Tsuna could say.

The pure white suit never felt heavier.

Reborn let go of his shoulders.

"Sometimes, I've forgotten how young you still are," Reborn said, and Tsuna wanted to say something to that, but decided against it. Despite his age, Reborn was still willing to trust his judgments, and that was enough.

Yet, Tsuna wondered what Reborn really meant. He was already twenty-one, a more than capable adult.

A gust of wind rushed in the room, and the white curtains flew again. A few pieces of document sitting under a paper weight fluttered in the breeze, and the delicate glass ornaments hanging in the room began to sing as the wind brushed past.

Tsuna turned to the window one last time and looked at the blue sky above. He took a deep breath.

The breeze smelled like summer.

Summers were good memories. Summers were brightest sun and brightest beaches and lightest breeze and sweetest fruits. Summers were his family's laugher, clear and filled with happiness. Summers were the memories of that person as they drove across Italy together in a summer day, smell of sweat hanging heavily in the air, dress shirt unbuttoned, suit jacket and tie flung in the back seat of the car, chilly eyes and an even chillier attitude piercing through the stifling heat.

But this was not summer.

Tsuna shut the window.

The white curtains fell silently back to the windowsill. The hanging glass pieces in the room stopped singing.

The scent of the summer breeze was gone, and Tsuna headed downstairs with Reborn to greet the guests.

* * *

><p>'<em>Let's drive, Hibari-san. It's such a nice summer day.'<em>

_**Then.**_

The summer after Tsuna officially became Vongola Decimo, the head boss of the Vongola family, he spent a grand total of one summer day with Hibari Kyoya, his Cloud Guardian.

That summer, everyone had arrived in Italy before Tsuna because he had some things to settle with his father before he could leave, so he ended up sharing the same flight with Hibari. Tsuna wasn't sure what Hibari's excuse was to come to Italy later other than the fact that he resented crowding, and had, a year ago, admitted that Tsuna's company wasn't half-bad. They both flew first class because Reborn wouldn't have it any other way, and both wore stiff suits for the same reason. Hibari-san had nothing to say about the matter, but Tsuna openly mentioned how unnecessary both things were. Not that he minded first class, but he definitely minded the suit.

They arrived in Pontecagnano Faiano, which Tsuna had planned before hand, and was further from their destination than many other airports. If Hibari noticed, he didn't say anything about it.

"Hibari-san," Tsuna had said, throat dry and heart thumping with nervousness. "Let's rent a car and drive ourselves to the mansion."

Hibari had looked at him questioningly; a silent beckon for an explanation, and Tsuna's palms began to sweat. He placed his suitcase on the ground, wiping his hands on his suit pants before gripping the handle again. Making a decision to look at Hibari in the eyes, Tsuna said. "Let's go across the coast again, for old times' sake."

Tsuna remembered a day in October, when he became the official head of the Vongola family, following the Ninth's death. Hibari had driven him along the Italian coast to calm Tsuna before he had to face his entire family back at the mansion, waiting for his command.

Hibari didn't say anything at first, and Tsuna was afraid that he had made him angry. Then, Tsuna saw something danced in Hibari's eyes, but it was gone before he could take a closer look.

"There is no one waiting for us at Arrivals, isn't there?" Hibari asked steadily, and Tsuna could feel heaviness in his words.

"N-no," Tsuna admitted. That was also planned. Gokudera had offered to meet them, and Reborn had offered to send someone, but Tsuna rejected the offers.

The silence passing between them was starting to make Tsuna nervous. He had planned this out without knowing what Hibari was going to think about it. Well, that was a lie. Hibari's response was the only thing that he could think about when he planned this out. Tsuna still had Gokudera's number and a first-aid kit ready should Hibari rejected the plan, and decided that he was irritated enough with Tsuna to sock him in the face.

Tsuna knew, from personal experience, that a punch from Hibari hurt like hell.

"Fine," Hibari said at last, and Tsuna blinked in surprise. "But I'm driving."

"Yes!" Tsuna said, brightening at Hibari's easy acceptance.

"We need to find a car rental service then," Hibari said, then, noticing the sheepish look on Tsuna's face, Hibari asked, sounding a bit irritated, probably being miffed at himself for giving in to a herbivore so easily. "What is it now?"

"I—" Tsuna began, not knowing how to say it without Hibari being angry at him. "I may have a rental car ready for us already."

There was another moment of silence as the implication of Tsuna's words sank in between them. Tsuna was so intent on waiting for Hibari's answer that he didn't register the buzzing of Italian around them or the pressing summer heat blaring in when automatic doors opened.

"Well?" Hibari said, and now, he really sounded irritated as he glared at Tsuna. "Don't just stand there. Let's go."

"R—really?" Tsuna said. "You're not mad?"

Hibari's eyes narrowed and Tsuna wished that he had kept his mouth shut.

"You're irritating me. Don't make me bite you to death."

"Ah, yes!" Tsuna said, beginning to lead the way. He noted that Hibari had stopped referring to him as herbivore, but decided not to voice the thought out loud.

That, however, didn't stop Hibari from giving Tsuna a smack the back of his head as he walked past. Tsuna rubbed his head gently and was glad to be in one piece afterwards.

He was surprised that Hibari accepted.

Tsuna wondered if Hibari already knew everything all along.

* * *

><p><em> 'I may not be a good fighter as you, Hibari-san, but I will protect the family with all I've got.'<em>

_**Now.**_

Tsuna tensed as he sensed a presence waiting at the end of the corridor, but calmed immediately once he recognized who it was. Tsuna didn't think he would come, considering his strong opinion about crowding and the strong wave of displeasure he had silently sent in the last family meeting regarding Tsuna's most recent life decision. He was leaning against the back wall of the corridor, right by the heavy ornate wooden doors.

"Hibari-san," Tsuna greeted warmly, although his stomach felt heavy, as if it was weighed down with stones. The last time they had seen each other was when Hibari promptly left the family meeting, his taunt back to Tsuna, not wanting to even look in Tsuna's direction.

Behind him, Reborn beat Tsuna to it. "I didn't think you would come today."

Hibari said nothing as he detached from the wall and walked toward Tsuna. Tsuna eyed him warily, wondering how their rocky but tentative relationship had come to this. He thought that they had an understanding between each other, a pack that they had one another's back. He didn't think Hibari would react so strongly against his decision.

Yet now, here Hibari was, showing up on this day even though he had opposed of its existence.

Tsuna didn't know whether to feel glad or disappointed that Hibari was here. Hibari's presence suddenly made Tsuna doubted the consequence of going through with his plan.

He waited patiently for what Hibari was going to do.

Hibari approached until he was about an inch away from Tsuna, but Tsuna didn't flinch away from the proximity. A rustling movement, and Tsuna realized that Hibari had pulled out a purple handkerchief from his pocket.

Hibari folded the handkerchief neatly before tucking it in Tsuna's left breast pocket. Tsuna could feel the brush of Hibari's hand burning through the layers of clothes, and he wondered if Hibari could feel the quickening beating of his heart, threatening to burst out of his chest. Tsuna could feel the warm caress of Hibari's breaths ruffling the top of his head. All of a sudden, he felt hyperaware of everything about Hibari, from the dark suit that he was wearing to the purple shirt.

"You forgot a handkerchief," was all Hibari said before he stepped back. Tsuna felt a cold void where Hibari's presence was right in front of him a moment ago.

"Thank you, Hibari-san," Tsuna said, although there was disappointment blooming in his chest. He didn't expect that he would have Hibari's blessing in this matter as well. Hibari, of all people.

It was strange, but of everyone in his family, Tsuna had expected Hibari to be the one to try to stop him. Tsuna didn't understand why this was so important to him, it just was. Tsuna thought of that one summer day where they drove along the Italian coast, and felt something cold pooling at the back of his neck.

Ignoring his own discomfort and the pounding of his heart, Tsuna walked past Hibari to the wooden door. His hands were on the handles when he heard Reborn's voice behind him.

"Aren't you coming?"

Tsuna paused in his track. He thought Hibari was coming with him. After all, he had gone all of his way from Japan to be here. He wouldn't have come if he wasn't backing Tsuna in this.

Hibari couldn't have come just to make sure that Tsuna was well-dressed.

"No" was Hibari's simple answer.

Tsuna tightened his hands around the door handles. He didn't say a word.

He didn't turn around as he listened to Hibari's soft footsteps faded away.

Tsuna did not know Hibari as well as he would like; everything about the man seemed to be a variable of uncertainty. But he knew Hibari's strength. He knew Hibari's stealth. So the faint footfall against the rich carpet had Tsuna's mind racing. It was as if Hibari wanted Tsuna to feel his fading presence, footstep by footstep, wanted Tsuna to know the distance between them wasn't one of the usual self-preference, but was Hibari's way of protesting, even if he wasn't going to stop Tsuna.

Reborn was silent behind him. He didn't prompt Tsuna to open the door and move forward, but he didn't tell Tsuna to stop with the plan either. Tsuna remembered Reborn's words, that Reborn was going to trust Tsuna with his own decisions, but he would really like Reborn to smack him in the head like he used to, "Dame Tsuna" and tell him what he should do.

But Reborn waited patiently for Tsuna to decide. Then, he spoke, repeating the words he had said before. "I forgot how young you still are."

Tsuna felt his insides curling.

"Interesting," Reborn said, and Tsuna knew that if he turned around, he would see Reborn watching Hibari's retreating back. "The handkerchief he gave you—it's the same color as his shirt."

_He knows._

Reborn knew.

Tsuna didn't know whether he was afraid or relieved. But nothing had happened between him and Hibari yet, nothing that would solidify whatever thought was floating in Reborn's mind.

There was nothing between him and Hibari.

Yet, Tsuna became hyperaware of the purple handkerchief on his chest, feeling it burning as intensely as Hibari's touch right above the steady beating of his heart. It burned as brightly as Tsuna's own dying will flame.

"Let's go, Reborn," Tsuna said, his hands steady on the handles as he gave the door a push.

* * *

><p>'<em>I want you to look at me.'<em>

_**Then.**_

They began driving to Salerno, and from there, to Vietri sul Mare on a long, winding road stretched around enormous mountains, overlooking a blue sea glittered with gold. The lane division was ambiguous, and the curve of the road dangerous, but Tsuna trusted Hibari's driving ability, seeing it first hand in many car chases. Tsuna knew that Hibari secretly loved driving, even more so if Hibari was by himself, and only tolerable when he was with Tsuna.

Tolerance was enough for Tsuna.

It was a fairly hot day, and Tsuna was beginning to feel the heat and the sweat that glued the fabrics of his suit to his skin despite the air conditioning in the car. His armpits and his back were damp and uncomfortable, and Tsuna wanted to peel off the suit jacket and the tie and the nicely pressed shirt, but felt shy at Hibari's presence. Hibari was still wearing all of his clothes, and he wasn't complaining, so Tsuna felt obligated to keep it on.

Tsuna kept his eyes on the scenery outside his window, but there wasn't much except for large, white rocks and the occasional plants that clung on the side of the mountain. The sea was on Hibari's side of the car, and Tsuna was scared that if he looked through Hibari's window, Hibari would mistakenly think that Tsuna was looking at him instead of the scenery. Although, if Tsuna was honest with himself, he wasn't sure if he would sacrifice a chance to study Hibari up close for a view of the sea.

"You're annoying me."

"HIIEEE!" Tsuna jumped in his seat, but then mentally hit himself for overreacting again. He thought he had outgrown this habit, but being within Hibari's presence never failed to revert Tsuna back. Tsuna turned to look at Hibari, swallowing a lump in his throat.

"I'm sorry, Hibari-san."

"Take off your jacket," Hibari ordered, eyes still on the road.

"Wha-what?"

"Take off your jacket if you can't handle the heat. Your fidgeting is annoying me," Hibari said.

"R-right," Tsuna said, relieved for the permission, glad to know that Hibari wouldn't be too annoyed with his low tolerance for the extreme. He honestly thought that Hibari would scoff and then bite him to death for being so weak.

Tsuna unbuttoned his suit jacket first, but was reluctant to take it off, even though he could feel the sweat on his skin cooling with the opening of the jacket. Taking a deep breath, he shrugged the jacket off his shoulders and tossed it to the backseat, sighing in relief. The tie came off next, and he kept the first three buttons on his shirt undone.

Even though Hibari was not looking at him directly, Tsuna could feel his skin prickling from the edge of Hibari's attention, as if Hibari was peering at Tsuna from the corner of his eyes. But when Tsuna turned to look at him, Hibari seemed to keep all of his attention on the road ahead.

Perhaps it was his wishful imagination.

Tsuna felt bare and vulnerable, as if he was shirtless rather than having only three buttons of his shirt undone.

"What is it?"

"Nothing," Tsuna replied hastily, turning away in embarrassment.

They fell back into a terse silence. Tsuna forced his gaze to the view outside his car window, which wasn't much because all he saw were more rocks and more bushes, but he didn't dare to glance in Hibari's side of the car. Yet, he could feel the side of his face burning from Hibari's presence alone.

The car entered a tunnel that cut through the mountain, and immediately the scene of rocks and bushes melted away to a faint reflection of Hibari on the glass, etching on Tsuna's own pale face. Tsuna's eyes latches on to Hibari's reflection, tracing the dark bangs delicately hugging the curve of his forehead to the bridge of his nose, following the tilt of his lips, the dark glint in his eyes, the line of his neck.

Tsuna imagined a bead of sweat trailing down Hibari's neck and his own lips reaching to catch it, brushing underneath Hibari's jaw to his collarbone, inhaling Hibari's musty scent. Tsuna's throat went dry at the image, and he shifted a little in his seat, his body feeling too warm. Tsuna licked his dry lips, his mind racing with guilt at the direction of his thoughts.

And then he saw it.

Hibari peered at Tsuna from the corner of his eyes, his gaze seemed to follow the brush of Tsuna's tongue across his lips. Tsuna felt his face burning, unable to look away from Hibari's reflection and afraid of turning around and catching Hibari's eyes dead on. He wiped his sweaty palms on his thighs, swallowing heavily when the weight of Hibari's attention grew with every passing second.

Then there was a flash of white light cutting across the glass, and Hibari's reflection melted away as the car reached the end of the tunnel.

* * *

><p>'<em>She is a lovely girl. I'm not in love with her, but I think I can be.'<em>

_**Now.**_

Her name was Francesca, and Tsuna could sense a tint of her German descent in her voice despite her Southern Italian sun-kissed skin and dark eyes. The folds of her bright yellow dress fluttered like wings when she bowed to Tsuna, and, as Tsuna expected, a soft but strong voice, in accented Japanese, "Good morning, Sawada-san."

She was to be his fiancé, if things went well.

Her brother, the head of the Morreti family, frowned in confusion, and Tsuna would laugh if this was not a formal meeting. "Good morning, Morreti-san. You don't have to be so formal."

Francesca lifted her head, wearing an identical expression as her brother's. "I apologize if I have made a mistake. I don't know much about Japanese culture, I'm afraid."

"Oh no," Tsuna said, reverting to Italian. "We're in Italy. It's only fair if I speak Italian, right? Besides, there's no need for formality."

"Oh," Francesca smiled. She wasn't as pretty as Kyoko or Bianchi, but her openness made up for it. "Umm—"

"Just Tsuna is fine."

Tsuna could sense her brother's disapproval before meeting his gaze. He had spoken to Armando once, and the man was not as pleasant as his sister.

It was alright. Tsuna didn't like him much either. There wasn't much to say about a man who was willing to sacrifice his sister because he couldn't protect his family himself. Not that Tsuna was going to hurt Francesca in anyway, but Tsuna couldn't imagine using any of his friends and sacrificing their happiness for his own gain.

Behind Tsuna, his guardians remained silent until Tsuna introduced them to the Morretis, and in turn, he waited for an introduction of the Morreti guardians. Surprisingly, it was Francesca and not Armando who spoke first.

"This is Alfonso, who is—" Francesca began, but then her brother interrupted.

"My right hand man, the second in command," Armando finished.

There was a tense silence where the siblings gave each other significant looks, but Francesca turned away first, the line of her shoulders slightly lower than it was before. Armando continued on the introduction as if Francesca never spoke. Behind him, Alfonso, the man who was introduced, tightened his fists by his side, his eyes fleetingly turned to Francesca momentarily before darting back to Armando.

Tsuna knew that there was an internal conflict within the Morretti family without his Hyper Intuition. His guardians were behind him, so he couldn't read their expressions. He wondered if any of them could see what he saw.

Tsuna had several guesses as to what was going on in the Morretti family. He did a background check first, and what little he found was enough for him to understand that the Vongola had the upper hand in this deal. If he and Francesca got married, the Morretti family would gain a sense of stability from the alliance after the tumultuous internal fighting resulted from the death of their leader last year. The alliance would benefit the Vongola as well, strengthening its hold in Italy.

"I thought the Vongola family had one more guardian?" Armando said, startling Tsuna out of his thoughts.

"Armando," Francesca said warningly.

It was kind of Francesca to interfere, but Tsuna could handle this himself, and besides, he could guess that she had little authority over her brother. Tsuna knew Armando probably did a background check to see if there was any weakness within the Vongola, and this seemingly harmless question was his way of testing that crack. Armando wanted to know if there was an internal conflict within the Vongola.

Suddenly, Tsuna felt a familiar presence. A gaze burned Tsuna's back, making the hair at the back of his neck stood on ends. No one seemed to realize it, but someone was watching them.

Tsuna knew this gaze.

Hibari-san.

Tsuna thought Hibari didn't want to come. He thought Hibari didn't want to watch.

Yet, despite his words in the hallway, Hibari was here.

Tsuna felt a relieved but sad smile threatening to break over his face.

"He is here," Tsuna said without looking back at Hibari. Behind him, a soft murmuring rose before Reborn cleared his throat, effectively halting his guardians in their confused whispering. "But our Cloud Guardian prefers to watch and protect our family from afar."

Tsuna didn't need to turn around to know that Hibari was standing at the upper right balcony overlooking the room. He could imagine Hibari now, in his black suit and purple dress shirt, arms crossed, chilly eyes glaring at the crowd below him.

Tsuna looked at Armando's frown and Francesca's unreadable expression. Somehow, his inability to read Francesca's considerate look worried him more than Armando's irritation.

Francesca was looking at something high up, behind Tsuna, and Tsuna knew that if he followed the direction of her gaze, he would find Hibari.

Francesca returned her gaze back to Tsuna, something sad and indescribable in her eyes.

"You have a lovely handkerchief," she said cryptically.

Tsuna could still feel Hibari's phantom touch as he tucked the purple handkerchief in Tsuna's left breast pocket.

"Thank you," Tsuna said, wondering how much Francesca was able to find out. He wondered if she would tell Armando.

Behind him, Hibari's presence felt reassuring and dangerous at the same time.

* * *

><p>~To be continued<p> 


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2.

* * *

><p>'<em>Love is confinement.'<em>

_**Then.**_

They made a pit stop because the sun was bright, and Tsuna wanted to dip his feet in the water. Hibari wanted to stay with the car, but with enough prompting by Tsuna, he decided to walk along the beach too, although he refused Tsuna's suggestion to take his shoes off.

Tsuna rolled his dress pants up to his knee, ignoring the fact that they would probably be ruined later. He walked along the wet sand, a trail of small footprints at his heels.

When Tsuna was eight, his mother had taken him to Hokkaido after his father left for another three year trip, so Hokkaido was just for the two of them; perhaps his mother had hoped that the bright sun and the blue water and the vastness of the ocean would fill the void his father left behind. Tsuna remembered getting angry at his mother because he wanted ice cream and she wouldn't take him and _why wasn't dad here? _and he remembered stomping furiously at the wet sand, eyes and nose stinging because he was crying so much. What burned in his mind the most, however, was when his mother teared up, and Tsuna stopped, looking with shame at his feet and realizing how small he was, how small of an imprint he left in the sand, how the coming wave easily washed his angry footprints away.

Tsuna stopped in his track and looked at the trail he had left behind. His footprints were bigger now for a bigger man. A wave crashed against shore and his footprints grew fainter and fainter, washing away slowly, just like they did fifteen years ago, no matter how much bigger they had become.

"What is it?" Hibari's voice startled Tsuna from his thoughts.

"Nothing much," Tsuna said, walking up to the drier sand by Hibari's side. "I was just thinking of how small I am."

"Everyone is small in this world," Hibari said, and Tsuna was amused.

"I didn't think Hibari-san of all people would say that," Tsuna laughed.

"I am strong," Hibari said, and Tsuna noticed that sturdy line of his back, stiffer than when he was in his teens. "But that does not mean I am not small. There is always something bigger than me."

Tsuna remembered seeing many of Hibari's wounds. He imagined that he could see those scars even now, even though they were all covered.

"That's true," Tsuna agreed, suddenly thinking of how Hibari protected Namimori with a fierce determination. Tsuna had something like that too, something that was bigger than him, something that he had to protect. Something that he had to put before his selfishness.

Tsuna wondered what Hibari thought of the Vongola.

"Do you ever feel confined, Hibari-san?" Tsuna asked out of curiosity. "Trapped by a force that is bigger than you?" Hibari was Cloud. He had the whole horizon to him; he could float where he liked, go where he pleased.

Tsuna always wondered why Hibari was fighting along his side all of this time, why Hibari chose the Vongola even though there didn't seem to be anything of benefit.

Hibari stopped walking, and Tsuna almost went on without him, but it only took Tsuna one second to feel the chilliness of Hibari's absence by his side. He turned back to Hibari, only to find Hibari staring intently at him.

"I will never be confined for long" was Hibari's answer, and that was true, but there was something about Hibari's words that made Tsuna felt cold. Hibari's gaze had Tsuna shivering to his bone, not quite from fear, but from an acute awareness of who Hibari was. It was difficult to forget, but sometimes Tsuna wanted to. Sometimes, Tsuna had hopes that Hibari was different, was more than his pride, was more than the killing intent that he displayed in battles, but perhaps Tsuna was lying to himself.

But then Hibari would arrive at his side, and Tsuna would remember why he had those hopes in the first place.

'_Why did you stay?' _Tsuna wanted to ask, but didn't dare to because a part of him was afraid that Hibari's answer wouldn't be something that he wanted to hear. There was something ugly in his heart, something dark and possessive that had hoped Hibari was staying with the Vongola because of him.

"No one would try to confine you, Hibari-san," said Tsuna, half-joking, half-truthful. "Not without you choosing to be."

Hibari looked furious, and Tsuna wondered what he had said to anger him. "Why would I choose to be confined?"

Tsuna had once asked his mother _why would anyone want to be confined?_ and his mother had smiled sadly, the same tilt of the lips that she had when she thought of his father. It was the first time that Tsuna realized love was something that confined people, and a poisonous thought stained his mind: if his mother didn't had his father, didn't had Tsuna, didn't remained confined by love, would she be happier?

Tsuna jerked slightly in surprise when he realized where his thoughts were heading, and he mentally slapped himself. There was no way that he was suggesting that Hibari could be confined by love, and there was no way that deep within his heart, he was hoping that it was because of him.

"I'm sorry," Tsuna said, for lack of anything better to say. Even though Hibari couldn't possibly looked into Tsuna's heart, Tsuna still felt like he should apologize for the dark thoughts swimming in his mind.

Hibari looked past Tsuna's shoulders and continued walking. They stayed side by side, but the silence between them was stifled. Tsuna felt how fragile and unsteady the ground underneath his feet was. He almost bumped into Hibari when Hibari slowed to a stop.

"Hibari-san?"

Hibari turned to Tsuna, and Tsuna lifted his gaze to Hibari's face, but the sun was directly behind Hibari's head, shrouding his face in shadow. Tsuna shielded his eyes and tried to peek through his fingers at the expression on Hibari's face, but he couldn't see well with the scorching light.

"What about you?"

There was something strange in Hibari's voice. Tsuna didn't know what to think of it at first, and he didn't know what Hibari wanted to hear because the answer was obvious. Hibari's face was close, too close, so close that Tsuna could sense, among the strong scent the salty sea, the faint, sharp smell of Hibari's sweat that scarfed around his neck. Tsuna had an urge to undo the first button of Hibari's shirt to see the damp collarbone, and then another button, peeling the wet shirt from Hibari's skin slowly, and then another button, if Hibari would let him.

Hibari's face was so close that Tsuna could feel the warm breath brushing against his cheek. Tsuna wondered if Hibari had been leaning down, or he had been reaching up.

But he must have been imagining that Hibari was moving closer to him because he could feel his balance tilting dangerously at the tip of his toes, and Hibari's face became farther and farther away as he drew away from Tsuna, probably because Tsuna was too close.

_It was only me_, Tsuna thought with a cold drop in his stomach. Hibari didn't feel the same. His attraction was one-sided.

But that was good that nothing was ever going to happen between them because Tsuna was Vongola Decimo and Hibari his cloud guardian. Tsuna had responsibilities, just as Hibari had his, and Tsuna couldn't afford to be selfish. It was dangerous, whatever this feeling he had for Hibari was, and he needed to back off. One day, he was to be married, and it wouldn't be to Hibari. One day, he was going to have an heir to the Vongola family.

Tsuna could see his future laid out in stones. Whatever this feeling he had for Hibari would someday be washed away like footprints in the sand.

"I belong to everyone, Hibari-san," Tsuna replied, and that was the truth. The Sky belonged to everyone and was confined to no one. But even though he was Sky, Tsuna felt more constricted than any of his other guardians.

A rush of cold air brushed past, and Hibari jerked away from him to walk on ahead. Tsuna didn't have the opportunity to read the expression on his face. When Tsuna finally returned to his senses, the feeling of Hibari's warm breath still lingered across his skin. He rushed to catch up to Hibari, but Hibari's face was blank, as if Tsuna had never answered him, and he wouldn't care if Tsuna did.

Tsuna felt like he should apologize and explained himself, but there was nothing to apologize for and nothing else to explain. He didn't owe Hibari anything, and Hibari didn't owe him anything, but Tsuna had a feeling that Hibari was upset by his words.

"Did I upset you, Hibari-san?"

"I belong to no one."

Tsuna was startled. Hibari's words seemed like retaliation.

"I know that," Tsuna said, but felt a little discomfited by this truth for reasons that he didn't quite understand. Hibari's words felt like a slap even though Tsuna continued to tell himself that it was okay; it was the truth, and the truth didn't hurt anyone.

Tsuna said to himself that it didn't hurt.

"Remember it," Hibari said curtly, and Tsuna wondered if they were having two different conversations because Tsuna didn't know why Hibari had to state the obvious. Tsuna already knew that no one could ever bind Hibari, and nothing could ever confine him.

"I will," Tsuna promised, and although the command came from Hibari, Tsuna felt as if Hibari might be more upset by Tsuna's agreement.

But that was probably his wishful thinking.

"Let's head back," Hibari said, but Tsuna suddenly had a strong urge to rebel. The sting from Hibari's words made him felt things that he didn't want to feel, anger and sadness and confusion all at once.

"I'd like to stay for a bit longer," Tsuna said.

Hibari said nothing, just gave Tsuna a nod and walked back to where they had packed the car. Tsuna watched his retreating back and almost regretted that he didn't head back with Hibari, that he had let Hibari left, but the other part of him said that he needed to do this for himself. The hollow feeling at the loss of Hibari's presence scared him because he didn't know he could feel this way about a person, and Tsuna was glad then, even though he still regretted it, that he could make the choice of parting with Hibari. It was liberating, in a way.

Tsuna didn't head back to the car until late afternoon, wet sand caking his legs and dress pants, all of his clothes soaked because his shoes fell in the water and was swept away by the waves, and he had jumped in after them.

Hibari was frowning when he returned.

"I'm sorry for staying out for so long and making you worried," Tsuna said.

"You didn't make me worried," Hibari said, starting the ignition of the car and not meeting Tsuna's eyes. "You could take care of yourself. You can't make me do anything, don't be so full of yourself."

Tsuna didn't say anything after that. The chilly ocean air still numbed his bones, so he just felt exhausted by Hibari's confusing presence.

They drove off in cold silence.

**QQQ**

'_We're one and the same.'_

_**Now**_

Everyone left Tsuna and Francesca in the large guestroom by themselves, while Gokudera took care of the remaining arriving party. Tsuna had heard that Francesca was fond of black tea, and had brought it for the purpose of making Francesca comfortable and their meeting less awkward. He hadn't thought that he would be the one needing comforting. Francesca didn't look like she was doing well either, sitting tensely on the plush seat and wringing her hands together nervously.

The tea sat in the fine china, untouched.

"How was Germany?" Tsuna asked conversationally. He remembered Francesca telling him a month back that she had to visit Germany, when they both were trying to find an arrange time for their families to meet.

"It was lovely," she replied, seemingly a little relaxed now that the silence was broken. "I spent the whole month with my mother in Holzminden. It was good to be home." Francesca was born in Germany and lived with her mother until she was thirteen and her father came to get her.

"Is your mother doing well?" Tsuna asked.

"She is," Francesca replied. "She lives with a housekeeper who helps her around the house because of her bad back, but the doctor said she's getting better."

"That's good to hear," said Tsuna. "Did you tell her about…this?"

"No," Francesca looked uncomfortable. "I was meaning too, but I couldn't find the right moment. She would have been very upset."

"I understand."

"Have you spoken to your parents about this?" she asked.

"No," Tsuna said sheepishly. "I haven't told my mother."

Francesca seemed to get the hint because she didn't ask about Tsuna's father, and Tsuna was glad because he really didn't want to head down that topic. Tsuna knew that Francesca's parents separated with a nasty divorce, so she must have learned quite a bit about avoiding the unmentionable, going from one parent to the other.

"Now that I've thought about it, I haven't been home for a while," Tsuna sighed. "I've talked to my mom on the phone, but it's different from actually seeing her."

"I understand." Francesca's eyes softened. "Hearing her voice is nice, but actually having her next to you feel more real."

"Before last spring, when was the last time you've seen your mother?" Tsuna asked.

"I haven't seen her for seven years." Francesca began to wring her hands together again. Tsuna heard the implied 'until my father's death' hanging at the end of her words. Francesca didn't say anything else, and Tsuna knew that she was feeling bad for revealing too much too soon.

"You can trust me," Tsuna said, but Francesca gave him a sharp look.

"I loved my father," she said firmly. "He was a difficult man, but I still loved him."

"I have no doubt," said Tsuna. "I apologize if I offended you." He was treading on dangerous grounds. They knew very little about each other, and Tsuna was at risk of being on her bad side if he accidentally dug up old wounds.

"It's alright," Francesca said, her hands flat against her lap. She reached for the cup of tea on the table and took a sip. It was probably lukewarm now, but she didn't seem to mind. "I do have a question to ask of you, I hope you don't mind."

"Not at all," said Tsuna, feeling anxious despite his lighthearted tone. "Only if I could ask you a question as well."

Francesca seemed to consider this, and Tsuna sat straighter in his seat, knowing that whatever she wanted to ask, he was going to have a difficult time answering.

"Of course," Francesca said, and it felt like a vow. She took another sip of the tea, and then studied the cup in her hand for a while before looking up at Tsuna once more.

Tsuna waited patiently. If Reborn had heard this, he would suggest that, when it was his turn, Tsuna should ask her a question with a higher price than the answer that she wanted from him. However, Tsuna wasn't sure if he wanted to do this. There was something sacred about their promise, something that felt more like a matter of trust than a cold exchange of information.

Francesca didn't say anything for a long time, and Tsuna knew that she was considering her question carefully. She only had one shot.

"That man," Francesca began, and then placed the cup back on the table, seeming to keep herself busy with minor movements because she was uncomfortable with meeting Tsuna's eyes. However, she looked up to meet Tsuna's gaze, and there was something in her eyes that made Tsuna wanted to look away.

He didn't.

"Your cloud guardian," she continued, and Tsuna felt his insides turned cold. "Is her your lover?"

"I've heard from some people that you have a lover," she continued, looking even more uncomfortable. "And that you've been with that person for a while."

There was a moment of silence.

Tsuna was so relieved by her question that a laugh threatened to bubble from his chest. For a moment, he thought that she was going to ask something he couldn't answer, something like _'Do you have feelings for him?' _but _this_, this other thing he could answer because it was so simple. So easy that it almost hurt to say out loud. It was in his mind, fantasy twisting around hope and longing.

"No," said Tsuna. "He isn't." There was nothing between them.

"Oh," Francesca deflated with disbelief and self-doubt. She looked like she wanted to ask again to make sure, but didn't out of respect and embarrassment.

Even though his answer was truthful, Tsuna felt like he was lying. He knew that Francesca wanted to know about his relationship with Hibari, but what they had between them was too complicated to put into words. Tsuna knew he felt _something_ for Hibari, but it wasn't love because love was something he used to feel for Kyoko, and whatever this something was that he felt for Hibari, love wasn't it, and he didn't know how Hibari truly felt about him. They were stuck in a stalemate, trapped in between _something_ and nothing.

Tsuna wasn't lying to Francesca, but he wasn't completely honest either.

"Alright," Francesca said. "Your turn."

Tsuna didn't know what to ask. He felt like he was cheating even though he wasn't. Francesca seemed like a nice person, and she didn't deserve lies. Her question didn't hurt him, and in turn, he didn't want to hurt her either.

He could tell her. Reborn would say that this was a stupid move, but Tsuna could do it. Tsuna didn't want to ask Francesca a question that she didn't want to answer, and he didn't want to force her into revealing anything that she didn't want to lay bare to a stranger, but maybe, if he told her, they would stand on even grounds.

"I'm sorry," said Tsuna.

Francesca looked startled. "Why?"

"I haven't been completely honest with you," Tsuna said, feeling anxious with what he was about to say. "Not about the relationship between my cloud guardian and me."

Francesca took a breath. She drew her feet back under the sofa and said stiffly. "You…you don't have to explain if you don't want to."

"I want to," said Tsuna. The urge to tell Francesca about it became stronger because he had a feeling that if he didn't, she would misunderstand. "I'd like to explain myself, if you would hear it."

"If you're sure," Francesca said. "You do know what it means when you tell me this, right? The kind of marriage that we'll have?"

Tsuna swallowed heavily. "Isn't it better for us both to live together with the truth than with lies and betrayal?"

"What's the point?" Francesca sighed. "Whatever you're going to tell me…your feelings won't change with our marriage."

"Perhaps," Tsuna agreed, and he could see it too, the dark days that they could have. A fragile marriage held together by their sheer will to survive in the mafia world—loveless, longing for someone else, constricting and choking them both until their chest tightened with anger and self-hatred. Tsuna wondered if that was how Francesca's parents divorced, with fury and pain and regret.

Tsuna didn't want that. At least, if he said the truth in the beginning, then they would both know what grounds they were going to be standing on.

"I don't want to hurt you more than I will be," said Tsuna. He was going to hurt her, and she was going to hurt him. They both knew that.

"I…I understand." Francesca lowered her head, and there was such a resignation on her shoulders that made Tsuna's heart ached. "I don't want to hurt you either. I'd like to hear what you have to say."

Tsuna clenched his fists in his lap, and Francesca waited patiently.

"I have feelings for him." Tsuna swallowed a lump in his throat. "For my cloud guardian."

There was a stiff silence, and Tsuna was waiting for Francesca's accusation that he lied to her, waiting for her angry words, but there was nothing but silence.

Francesca said nothing, and Tsuna felt the urge to explain himself.

"I've never told him about my feelings. There isn't anything between us—there _couldn't_ be anything because of my position, and because he said that he wouldn't be—that we couldn't be…." Hibari's words flashed back through his mind, _'__I belong to no one,' _and Tsuna knew that Hibari would never belong to him in ways that mattered. "We can't be together. Not then. Not now."

Silence fell between them again, until Francesca took a shaky breath. "Do you still love him?"

"I don't know if I love him in that way yet," Tsuna replied honestly. "I'm attracted to him, and I care for him a great deal, but I love all of my family. I haven't had a chance to sort out my feelings yet."

"You haven't been given a chance to love him in a capacity beyond something platonic yet," Francesca concluded. "But you can, and you want to."

"I don't know if I want to," said Tsuna.

Francesca blinked.

"Ah, it's not like that," Tsuna waved his hands as if they could dispel the misunderstanding. "It's just… I don't know if I can."

"You're scared," Francesca observed, and Tsuna was startled.

"What?"

_Scared? _

His chest jerked at the thought. It felt like a close hit, and Tsuna didn't know that he was afraid in the first place.

_But afraid of what?_

Then, looking surprised herself, Francesca placed a hand over her mouth and shook her head slightly. "I'm sorry, it's not my place to say that."

"No, it's fine."

A gentle silence was between them now; a feeling of trust bridged them. Tsuna felt much lighter with the weight of his secret out, and this made him feel brave. He could go into an arranged marriage and he would be able to face it without fear because he had accepted what he couldn't have.

"It's your turn."

"Mine?"

"It's your turn to ask me whatever you want to ask me," Francesca said. "It's only fair."

"Oh," Tsuna scratched the back of his head, a bad habit that he never managed to get rid of. "But I don't have anything to ask you."

"You don't?"

"No," said Tsuna. "I'm sure if you have something you want to tell me, you will."

Francesca studied him for a moment. "You're a very interesting man, Tsuna. Must have broken some hearts in high school."

"No," Tsuna shook his head with a sad smile. When he was in high school, he was Sawada Tsunayoshi, not Vongola Decimo. There was nothing particularly special about Tsunayoshi; growing out of his no-good character made him even more ordinary, like a shadow, not good enough to be admired, but not bad enough to be memorable.

Perhaps that was why Tsuna decided to meet with Francesca rather than any other possible women. She was similar to him, plain in both looks and character, dragged into the mafia world by blood and not choice.

They sat together in silence, and Tsuna thought about doing this—sitting in stillness with her for the rest of his life, and he thought about what spending his life with Hibari would feel like. It scared him that he was even considering it, but it scared him even more that he didn't know what the future would look like with Hibari.

* * *

><p>~To be continued.<p> 


End file.
